Poison apple.

I was at an Apple service provider waiting for an iPhone replacement when this guy who was talking to another Apple employee started threatening her.

He was furious because she wouldn't replace his iPad. She was extremely patient and repeatedly tried to explain to him that the store was just an authorized service provider and not an Apple store, so they would need approval from Apple's regional office to replace his tablet.

He asked for a piece of paper, scrawled his Twitter handle on it and repeatedly told the girl to check it to see how many followers he had. "You'll be surprised," he said. "I'll be tweeting about this. Show your manager and maybe they'll change their mind." He also said his number of followers "would put a dent in Apple" and that he'd never buy another Apple product again.

He was still at it when I left. Nuts.

Poison apple.

Wonderturkey

Article sources: 1, 2.

Bottle service.

My store has a really crappy price match policy. There are a few things we will not match.

I had an older gentleman come in to price match five bottles of Pepsi. We sold them for $1.50 apiece and a competitor sold them for $1. We couldn't price match because the competitor's deal required you to have their loyalty card.

So the guy grabbed one of the bottles, started to open it, and said, "If you won't match, I guess I have to pour this pop over your register. What are you going to do then?"

I said, "If you do that, I'm going to call the cops."

He got super upset and couldn't understand why I would call the cops on him. I tried to explain that he just threatened to vandalize the store's property. After he understood, he walked out.

All over $2.50.

Bottle service.
Retail as old as time.

I once worked at a little gaming store next to a big retailer. I didn't get commission or anything. I just helped kids pick out games and sold the odd Xbox here or there.

Some guy came in asking me to match the retailer's deal on a Nintendo DS. For whatever management reason, I couldn't do it. He started to get really angry. But there was nothing I could do. My hands were tied.

So he left. I thought nothing of it. Then he walked past about 15 minutes later and screamed from the door: "I GOT IT FROM [retail store] FOR [price] AND I'M NEVER COMING BACK, YOU C___!"

I was a 15 year old girl.

Retail as old as time.
Smoke and mirrors.

I had a friend who was so anti-smoking that she would go up to a smoker and say: "Hey, I'll show you a trick. Empty out all your cigarettes and give me the packet."

They would oblige and hand her the empty packet. She would then tear it up into little pieces and walk away.

Smoke and mirrors.
Calculated cruelty.

I had just received a brand new Gameboy as a birthday gift when my cousin, who was 5 years older than me, grabbed it and smashed it to the floor.

He said he thought it was A CALCULATOR, and I didn't really need it because I was "already good at math."

Calculated cruelty.
Sic transit gloria mundi.

My buddy won a full ride scholarship to the local university and was overjoyed because his family are working-class stiffs and just didn't have enough money to pay for college. All he needed were three recommendations saying that the scholarship was deserved.

He got the first two no problem and decided to go to our Latin teacher for the final one. Because he was a Latin tutor and competed in Certamen (Google it), he figured she would be willing to help.

Every single day for two weeks, he asked her before class if she had signed the papers yet, and she always responded, "I will."

Finally, the deadline to turn in the acceptance form was due and she still hadn't signed it. He approached her as I was walking into class and asked her why she didn't sign it. Her response was, "I purposely didn't sign it because I didn't want you to get that scholarship. You don't deserve it."

Goodbye 55,000 dollars. Hello crippling debt.

Sic transit gloria mundi.
Too little too late.

Three days before a 7-week assessment was due, my design tutor told another student in my class that her work was terrible and that she had to start again. The girl had been working on the same design for 5 weeks, and the tutor could've told her at any point to restart, but he chose to wait until it was too late. Absolutely no reason.

Too little too late.
Toys-Aren't-Us.

I was ten years old, and we were moving. In front of my eyes, all of my toys were sold for $7. D-bag move, mom.

Toys-Aren't-Us.

[deleted]

Foul deed.

9-year-old me was at a baseball game when a foul ball came dribbling down the side of the field. When the batboy caught it, I ran down the steps waving my arms for him to toss it to me. He looked right at me, and threw it my way. But some jerk behind me stood up and snatched it right out of my hands.

The story has a happy ending though because all three sections surrounding us started chanting angrily at him. He got booed out of the park, and someone who caught a foul ball earlier came and gave me his.

Foul deed.
Call on me.

I worked at a local ice cream shop when I was a kid.

On a particularly busy afternoon, I was whipping up someone's ice cream when I overhear things getting heated at the cash register. One of our owners Lynn was working there and an upset woman was complaining about the price of her order.

Lynn broke down each item and how much tax was. The customer responded that she deserved a discount and if she didn't get one that she would be calling her good friends, who owned this establishment. Lynn calmly said, "I'm Lynn and I own this establishment. Please leave." I've never seen someone turn red so fast.

Call on me.
Something for nothing.

When I was bartending once, I picked up a table so that a server could go home early. The guests at the table were super rude to me. They wouldn't call me by my name and just kept calling me different racial slurs against white people (even though I'm Mexican). I smiled and gave them great service, but it was clear they were trying to get something for free.

When they asked for my manager, I couldn't hear what they were telling him, but the couple seated at the end of the bar near their table spoke up and told my manager they were lying.

We ended up calling the police when they refused to pay their tab which was over a hundred dollars.

Something for nothing.
Nobody threatens Microsoft.

A few weeks ago, I told a client that he really needed to upgrade his copies of Office 97 to the current version. I gave him a whole list of reasons, including that Microsoft stopped releasing security updates for that version quite a while back.

He flipped out and demanded that I "call Microsoft" and tell them that they needed to keep releasing security updates for Office 97. When I told him it didn't exactly work that way he said, "Well you just tell them who I am and make sure they know that if they don't fix this I'll never buy another version of Office again!"

Just... wow.

Nobody threatens Microsoft.

[deleted]

Chicken.

I used to work at the local grocery store throughout high school as a bagger/cashier.

One day, a man walks in with a coupon for $2 off of a $6 chicken. After explaining to him that the coupon was expired and that I could not accept it, he calmly says: "Oh really? Well, I'll get it anyway."

A few hours later, one of my coworkers come running in yelling that everyone's tires were flat.

We reviewed the surveillance footage. It showed the man walk outside, throw the chicken into the air, freak out, and start slashing everyone's tires.

He ended up having to pay all of the damages and was no longer allowed near any of the employees.

Chicken.
Training day.

I take the train to work. You see all sorts of little teenage jerks on there (even at 6 in the morning).

Some teenager decided it'd be a good idea to steal - I kid you not - from what must have been an 80-year-old woman.

He took her handbag just as the doors opened to get off. I grabbed hum by his neck on the way out so he couldn't get off, and made him return the woman's bag with an apology.

He then had to sit in silence while a carriage full of people judged and hated him for a few minutes.

Training day.

[deleted]

Yo man, yo.

I was in 7th grade, and had a yo-yo at school with me to mess around with. Stupid toy, but it was fun to play with, and several kids had them.

The biggest bully in school comes up to me and says, "Can I see that?" I know the guy, never had a problem with him, so I say sure. He takes it, does a couple yo-yo things, and then without pause, turns around and walks away with it.

I didn't say anything, just stood there.

Only time in my life as a kid that I was ever bullied. I was helpless. Going after this guy would've been suicide and I knew it.

I resented that, that feeling of powerlessness, I kept it my whole life. That incident stayed with me, and grew. That kid went on to basically own my whole town, kind of like a villain in one of those stupid 80s movies. He owns everything around here - you can't spit without hitting something he owns.

Yo man, yo.
Chili willy.

I was in a youth hostel in Poland. Two Norwegian guys had come in at about 5am, completely trashed and, seeing someone casually walking around in their boxer shorts, one of them decided to one-up them by going up to the young, pretty, female receptionist, dropping his pants and showing her his junk.

Then he stuck it in the burger he had and asked her if she wanted a bite. The burger had a load of chili sauce on it however, so moments later he was screaming. Instant karma.

Chili willy.
Rest in pizza.

There's this guy who used to hang around with my friend group. Let's call him Bob.

We are out at bar late, and the staff is making it clear that it is time to pack up. We make one final cheers. About 8 pint glasses are all in the air when Bob slams his glass down on top of the rest, shattering them all and raining beer everywhere. Then he sprints out of the joint. We follow him to the late night pizza joint which has a out the door. When Bob gets to the cash, he orders the last two slices of pepperoni, drops them face-down on the floor and smears them around with his foot.

We don't hang out with him anymore.

Rest in pizza.
Owned.

"I know the owner and I will get you fired."

"My dad's the owner, and he warned me you're a jerk. Now go away."

Owned.
In training.

Some customer was snapping at the new person for making their drink wrong. And this poor girl is fumbling with the drinks/reading the recipes for most of them, so it's easy to tell she's pretty new.

The customer was nastily asking how this sort of thing could happen.

I stepped in and used a line that has a surprising amount of potency. "Well, as humans, we're prone to making the occasional mistake. We'll get you another one. The issue was the milk type, right?"

Ya'll don't be messing with people who are clearly new in a cafe.

In training.
Sale away.

I work behind the customer service counter at a local grocery store. I had a lady come up to me one day, already yelling and cursing, asking "Do you have any more of the meat on sale in the back?"

I calmly told her no, and that I would gladly write her a raincheck. She didn't like this response one bit.

"HOW CAN YOU ADVERTISE SOMETHING IF YOU DON'T HAVE IT ON THE SHELF?!" I responded with "Other people shop here, you know." She then said, "I know that, I'm not stupid." I replied, "Obviously you are."

She then turned away and left. Mind you, my manager is behind the counter with me this entire time. All he could do was burst out laughing, and compliment me on how awesome that was.

Sale away.
On the way to the forum.

I have small accessories I sell for one of our product lines. One of them costs $20.00, and shipping and handling via the mail is $4.00. Perfectly reasonable.

This guy went off the rails because I would not give him any deal. He threatened to post his sordid tale on all the popular forums that pertained to the industry. I pretty much told him to go ahead and didn't think much about it.

I come back in after the weekend; the guy went ahead and posted a bunch of new threads on all the major forums, and e-mailed me all the links. I checked them all, and the forum community members pretty much all told him to stop being such a cheap jerk. I felt pretty happy about it after that.

On the way to the forum.
Just the tip.

I worked as a pizza delivery driver when I was in high school. I went to this house with a huge order. The guy answered the door and was paying with a credit card. He filled out his portion of the slip, then looked me in the eye and said, "I guess this is where I enter the amount for your tip."

Then he dropped the terminal on the ground and slammed the the door in my face. No tip and the biggest jerk move I've ever experienced.

Just the tip.

[deleted]

Wing man or pilot?

I'm at the club with a good friend of mine. He's playing wing man for me since he has a girlfriend and I don't. He introduces me to a nice looking girl and we hit it off. I go to the bar to buy a round, come back and they are nowhere to be found. I call him, no reply. Fast forward to the next day: he texts me to say he had hooked up with her. What a piece of garbage.

Wing man or pilot?
Jock, strapped.

I was in Junior High when after class a slightly nerdy, very shy student lends one of the big jocks $5 for lunch. The jock promised him he would pay him back the next day.

The next day arrives, and the student asks for his money back from the jock (he was relying on the money for lunch that day). The jock glares at him and then starts laughing at the shy student's face saying he won't pay him back.

He even had the $5 but just waved in front of his face and continued laughing.

Jock, strapped.
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