This is puzzling.

I found out that when my mother found out she was pregnant with me, she decided to keep me just so she could prove to my father that she wasn't cheating on him.

First words out of her mouth to my father after it was determined my blood type is the same as my father's: "What now?"

I was born with the purpose of winning an argument.

This is puzzling.
So sad.

My mom and dad were introduced to each other by their dealer. When my dad asked him, "What's she like?"the dealer told him, "She buys by the pound and likes to have a good time." He told me this, while crying, a few days after she died. I was 12.

So sad.
Torn.

After my mom died, I found out she was an addict and using the money that was supposed to help pay my college tuition to feed her addiction (instead I took out loans every semester/applied for grants). It was frustrating because I wanted to be able to yell at her and be angry but I felt guilty both because she was dead and because she was otherwise a very good parent.

Torn.
Oh my.

My dad works as a gynecologist at a large hospital. He deals with a lot of women in our town.

The strange part is I know a lot of friends who go to him.

Oh my.
What a story.

I grew up being told by my family that my mother abandoned me. I later found out that my father took me from her. We were on the run the entire time I was in elementary school. I never had a stable set of friends at that time because I went to a different school every year. I slept in bunk beds with my dad growing up in a one bedroom apartment. I was 18 when my mother's private investigator found me and I learned the real story.

What a story.
Secrets galore.

Okay so, I've been crossdressing for my whole life. I never really told anybody and I definitely never got caught doing it. It's a private thing and I enjoy it and it makes me feel good, so screw the haters. Anyway, so about two years ago I'm on my parents computer looking for some game or file I downloaded years back, and I accidentally stumble upon my dad's huge collection of Crossdresser images. I mean like, huge collection. Since then I've felt really strange about the whole thing.

Secrets galore.
More villain like.

You know how people claim that western nations are stealing the oil in poor African nations... Well my dad is one of the guys stealing the oil. Over the years he has setup drilling deals with pretty much every despot dictatorship with oil in the world. Still I love him because he's my dad but it's weird knowing so many people demonize him. Growing up I always thought my dad was like James Bond because he got to go to all these exotic places only to grow up and realize he is more like a James Bond villain than anything.

More villain like.
Look at that.

I found out my mom writes Harry Potter fanfics about Harry and Malfoy discovering their burgeoning desires with each other. Enjoy that.

Look at that.
An empire.

I found out my parents used to be in the Moonshine business in West Virgina. I later I found out that they were also growing mushrooms.

An empire.
Good lord.

Walked in on my dad, mom and stepmom together. They were not "just friends."

Needless to say, I nearly puked there and then.

Good lord.
Quite the plot twist.

I was at my buddy's house, I've known the guy for a few months and his mom asks us to go and get a box of pop in the pantry in the basement. Followed my friend incase of assistance, friend sees boxes he didn't recognize, opens to find 5-7 boxes of adult toys, basically any kind of dirty thing you can imagine.

We both are confused and went back upstairs, he waited until I left to ask but he told in class the next day that his parents run a shop online and are the largest one in Canada.

We crack jokes about it all the time when I'm over now.

Quite the plot twist.
The classic 'headphones' trick.

I'm pretty sure my dad poses as a female online...in order to chat up other females...

And that my Mom knows.

The latter I know because they had a mini, hushed argument while I was in room, thinking I was listening to music through headphones.

The classic 'headphones' trick.
Joke's on her.

My mom recently told me she never wanted kids, and finally said "eh, what the heck" and succumbed to my dad's pleading once they bought the right house.

Joke's on her though; she turned out to be a fantastic mother.

Joke's on her.
Great show.

This didn't happen to me, it happened to my dad.

Back in the mid-70's (when I was but a young-un), we lived in a large block of apartments (on the 7th floor). This block faced a couple of other similar apartment blocks.

One night when my mum was out and the kids were in bed, my dad and a couple of buddies decided they were going to watch a 'dutch' movie they had acquired. Now, this was back in the days before VCR's and DVD's. So, they set up the projector. Not having a wall large enough to project the movie on to, they hung a large white bedsheet in front of the balcony windows. Then, they grabbed a few cold beers and sat down to watch...

An hour or so later, when the movie was finishing, they heard a light smattering of applause... they took down the sheet to reveal a significant number of people on the balconies of the other apartment blocks applauding their night-time show.

Great show.
No words needed.

I found my dad's adult DVDs by accident while I was in high school. He mixed them up within a binder of pirated movies he would watch at work. One time, I had borrowed the binder for the day. I ensured him I'd return the binder and all of the discs inside when he got back from work.

Needless to say, once I discovered the discs were not the ones I was looking for, I accidentally left one inside of my laptop. As I returned to the binder to him, he compulsively checked each flap of the binder to make sure there was a disc. When he noticed that disc was missing, he glanced at me and asked where the missing disc was. It was the only disc not labeled. He didn't mention it by name or content; just that "a disc" was missing.

I awkwardly responded that I had left it in my laptop, which was sitting on the coffee table in front of me. It felt like forever while my goddamn Macbook was deciding whether or not it was going to eject the DVD. Mac OS X ejected the disc while my father said absolutely nothing. Instead, we exchanged nods of understanding and implied masculinity as I handed the disc to him. We never talked about it again.

No words needed.
Too much.

When I was about 11 me and my family were on a road trip. After we've stopped for dinner one night we were sitting down by the table in our caravan. The table in this caravan could be transformed into a sleeping area.

So as we're sitting there eating, my mom and dad are talking and reminiscing about past road trip they've done in this old caravan that had served my family for many decades. Just as I'm about to take a big bite my dad says "I think it was right here, on this side of the caravan, that he was conceived..."

I would like to sincerely thank my dad for waiting with that comment until I had finished half the meal, at least.

Too much.
Quite the...gift.

Mine was when my dad tried to give me a bunch of his old "Adult manga" comics a few years ago. Not to mention there was a bunch of playboy stuff in his room too he didn't seem to want to part with.

Of course now later that he's moved to another state, he gave me a bunch of random stuff in the box.

Those comics were in there.

Quite the...gift.
Yikes!

My friend's dad was setting up for a family night watching a slide show of the big 'once in a lifetime' family 4 week holiday to the US (We're English).

During set up, (in front of the family,) an adult film starts flashing up on the projector. The dad panics, starts cycling through more and more. Mom's going crazy, daughter's crying. My friend tries to settle the mood by saying, 'It's a work laptop! sometimes other people leave their stuff on it by mistake!' alt+f4, back to desktop. dad tries again and succeeds. my mate and his dad give each other knowing looks and carry on with the evening.

Wish I'd been there.

Yikes!
Hope it works out.

Even though my parents are separated and seemingly hate each other, my dad is still clearly in love with my mom, and no matter how much my dad pushes her away, my mom is subconsciously open to the idea of getting him back. My dad however, has a pride issue, and is incapable of admitting his love for my mom, incapable of acting on it, or sacrificing for it.

I regret learning this and I don't. The reason I regret learning this is because now I look at the two of them differently. And I hate the fact that I see my dad for who he is. A guy who is completely miserable without my mom. He's a functioning addict, and its clear as day that his only cure is getting my mom back. At the same time I don't regret learning this, because its what got me back together with my girlfriend. I realized that I too have an ego/pride issue, and that I was still in love with my girlfriend, but incapable of admitting it, acting on it, or sacrificing for it. Once I realized how crazy I was being, it all hit me. I needed Lyndsey back. And now all is right in the world.

My parents have always been separated while I was growing up, and the idea of them being together sounds grotesque to me. But they've both been single for the longest time, and really they only need to put their pride aside and be happy together.

Hope it works out.
The no-friend zone.

I didn't know people wanted to be friends with me.

My mom didn't like the people in my neighborhood for some reason, so when they would call me to go hang out she would tell them that I'm busy or that I flat out didn't want to hang out with them.

Throughout middle school and high school, I would cry myself to sleep because no one would talk to me at school and I wouldn't get invited to parties and events.

I found out two years ago that it was because she turned them away.

The no-friend zone.
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