The Truth Always Reveals Itself In The End

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The Truth Always Reveals Itself In The End

"A good friend of mine for 20 years moved to a different state but we still kept in contact and traveled to see each other.

Years before, when we were in junior high, he went to juvie for violating another kid. Being a dumb, naive kid in their early teens, I somehow believed his sob story, that she had made it up because she was a vengeful ex.

About a decade later, he was engaged and they were planning to move to my state. Out of nowhere, the relationship dissolved and he moved here by himself. He made up some weird story about how it was her fault, and the whole, 'fool me once...' saying kept floating in my head. I ended up contacting his ex to find out what happened, and she described some of the most horrific accounts of abuse I'd ever heard. It made me sick. I blocked all of his social media accounts, told him to stay away from my friends and family, and put him on blast on all the dating sites as a warning."

No One Was Safe From This Midlife Crisis

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No One Was Safe From This Midlife Crisis

"She married a terrible person, but apparently it just revealed her character.

She and I became friends as moms and were known as besties for years. But when she confided to cheating on her wonderful, hardworking husband, essentially as a midlife crisis to 'feel beautiful again,' I told her she was making a mistake and should stop. Those were the first cracks in the friendship - that I didn't go along with her morally awful decisions. At the time I thought I was being an adult by staying friends with her even though I didn't like the cheating secret keeping.

In the 10 months that followed that revelation, she divorced her husband, left the seven kids with him, married the new jerk, and got extensive plastic surgery. Or so I've heard through mutual friends.

She lost me for good when, at the divorce announcement, she told people she was leaving because her husband was 'secretly abusive and had a drinking problem but I've been brave for my children for years.' None of which was true, and no mention of her cheating."

Some Of Us Are Capable Of Changing, Others Not So Much

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Some Of Us Are Capable Of Changing, Others Not So Much

"My ex-best friend and I met working in a restaurant together. I was around 25 and was in the middle of basically squandering my mid-20's by drinking and partying way too much. He was about that life too, and we bonded pretty quickly over our shared love of partying. Over the next three years, we became inseparable. I've lost count of how many times I crashed in his guest room and woke up the next day to keep the party going. Well, in the end, I went too far off the deep end with my partying issues. He stuck by me through it, but as an enabler and not a true helper.

In his defense, neither of us knew any better, and I appreciated his 'help' when he gave it to me. I moved out of state to get a reset on life, and I got my issues under control. We continued to talk regularly while I was living out of state, and even until I got the news that I was coming back to my hometown for work. I got home, and things instantly felt different. As it turns out, during my six months away, we had gone in opposite directions. I had gotten myself under control, saved money, started on a legit career path, and met a wonderful woman who I love. He, on the other hand, had started drinking a 12-pack every day (usually more, to be honest), blew through the savings he and his fiancèe had accumulated, lost said fiancèe, and stayed at the same crappy serving job we used to work together.

Above all of this, he had become angry and possessive after the loss of his relationship. We hung out a handful of times, but I always left his house wasted because the only thing he did for fun is drink, and I'm a bit of a chameleon, so I would join in. I didn't, and don't need that in my life. He had also been busted red-handed lying to me about my girlfriend on two occasions. Once he tried to tell me she cheated on me while I was at work all weekend, and the second time he told me that he had seen her out one night when I knew for a fact she was at home while I was working because she was sick. I realized that I had no room in my life for that toxicity anymore. It sucks, because I do miss the fun times we used to have together, but I'm better and happier for it."

Mental Illness Is No Joke

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Mental Illness Is No Joke

"We were both in the military when we were younger. To this day, I still owe this guy a debt of gratitude. I was a pretty shy kid growing up but this guy, I'll call him A, would always pump me up by quoting the movie 'Swingers' and telling me: 'You're so money. You're so money and you don't even know it.' We got into our squabbles as young guys in the military do, but for the most part, he was a standup guy.

The years progressed, and he visited me at my next duty assignment on the West Coast; we were originally on the East Coast. We didn't see each other as much, but when I deployed to Iraq or Afghanistan he'd always let me stay the night with him in his apartment, taking me out on the town and just being a good dude.

The years continued to go by and he even came out to stand as one of the groomsmen in my wedding, giving me a great toast and telling me how proud he was of how much I'd changed since we first met.

But when I got stationed overseas back in 2011, we lost contact. We talked off and on for the three years I was away, but when I got back, I heard from his sister what happened.

He got out of the military and took a job as a civilian contractor. He was doing well but had to take a lifestyle polygraph test in order to get a better job. He failed miserably. He lied about soliciting ladies of the night and other vices after he got out of the military. The polygrapher knew he was lying and then he admitted to it, thus costing him even more. Not only did he not get the clearance, but he lost his existing clearance.

He left the east and moved down south, trying to finish his Master's degree. But he couldn't. Strike number two. He failed out of that program. He was still able to get a decent job working at an IT company but he got fired from that after it was found that he was behaving inappropriately with a few of his female co-workers. He was always a lothario but apparently had gone too far in this case.

This all ended up with him getting depressed and threatening to kill himself while the cops stood him down. He was involuntarily committed to a mental institution and was never the same.

I was flabbergasted when I heard all of this and immediately tried to make contact. He kept avoiding my calls, but I was finally able to get a hold of him. He sounded so different and distant on the phone. I told him I was here for him and would do whatever he needed, but he told me in an ice-cold voice something that still kind of haunts me: 'I'm not the same person that you used to know.'

And he was right.

I kept trying to engage with him over the next couple of months, but he'd never pick up or answer my calls. Finally, I was able to get a hold of him when he was able to get work in Texas, but he was gone by this point. But I told him how much he meant to me and still means to me, how he brought me out of my shell and was a big part of becoming the person I was today. He didn't care one way or the other, and after that day, we haven't spoken since."

Friendship Wasn't The Only Thing They Lost

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Friendship Wasn't The Only Thing They Lost

"We were best friends from preschool to the eighth grade. One night, while her parents were at a wedding, her older cousin was staying the night. Her cousin was downstairs all night, and my friend invited her friend (boy) who was two years older than us over. I was already a little uncomfortable because my friend lied to her cousin saying this boy was the same age as us. We were upstairs in her room listening to music and reading magazines when out of nowhere, my friend took her shirt off and started dancing around in her bra.

This boy told her to dance in her underwear, so she did. He asked me to and I said no. My friend started making fun of me and calling me a prude. He then held me down and kept trying to yank my pants off. I kept kicking him, so my friend started helping him. He got my pants halfway down and he kept reaching in my underwear and under my bra. So I started yelling for him to stop, and I kicked him hard in the face. He stopped and went home. When he left, I got into a fist fight with my friend. Her cousin (who was asleep the whole time) never found out.

I walked home, and I was too embarrassed to tell my mom. The next day I felt like I needed to talk to someone, so when I went for a walk with another friend, I told her what happened. She told her mom, her mom called my mom, and we went to the police station (because my soon to be ex-friend told the boy my mom called her mom and told her what happened, so his mom ran to the police station to press charges on us for making up lies about her son).

Of course, word spread around school, and I was embarrassed and depressed. My friend lied to everyone saying that I was the one who was taking my clothes off and trying to get him to sleep with me, and he didn't want to, so I made up lies about him. That ended our friendship, and it made it hard for me to become close to any other friend again."

Ripped Apart Without A Choice

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Ripped Apart Without A Choice

"I knew my best friend since middle school. Went to the same college and graduate school. We both moved across the continent to Silicon Valley. We'd go out biking every weekend and sometimes even during the work week in the early morning or afternoon. We could finish each other's sentences.

After his girlfriend cheated on him (baby included) he decided to stay with her. No problem for me: it's not my woman. We'd still hang out once per week for a couple more years, though I never once saw her or the new kid. It was as if he was leading two completely separate lives.

And then, 4 years ago, they got married and she decreed that he couldn't see me anymore. She's so insecure about her earlier cheating that she thinks every one of his friends judges her for it. I'm truly indifferent about it. It's none of my business. Whatever makes them happy.

A few times per year, we do a short lunch bike ride. She doesn't know about those. But I'm essentially out of his life. He hasn't been to the new house that we bought 3 years ago. I haven't even seen his new kid yet. (He's 2 now.) My request to visit them due to the new baby was rejected. ('Maybe later...')

I still bike multiple times per week, often the same trails as the ones we did together. It still bothers me that this was taken away from me.

When I'm in a really bitter mood, I wish she'd cheat again."

A Tale As Old As Time

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A Tale As Old As Time

"The last time I had a best friend that wasn't my significant other was in high school. We'd known each other for years and were incredibly close. We'd always promised to have each other's back, and I legitimately saw her as my best friend.

Well, we got about two years into high school, and she started dating around. It didn't bother me a bit at first. I got along with pretty much all the guys by that point. Then Chris happened. Chris is a jerk. Chris spent our entire middle school years trying to trip me, making fun of me, and trying to slam my head in lockers because I had the audacity to get assigned the locker below him. Just an awful person all around. My supposed best friend knew this. She started dating him anyway.

Well, I found that out one morning when I met up with her at our normal spot and he was there. I was a doormat at that point in my life and figured so long as he didn't start crap I wouldn't say anything. Well, Chris hadn't stopped being a jerk overnight and within minutes he was just laying insults into me.

I don't remember what any of those insults were. I didn't care. But when my supposed best friend for life not only didn't stop him but JOINED IN? Yeah, no. I remember just being kind of stunned silent until a couple of my sister's friends walked by, saw what was happening, and called Chris out on being a prick. They were genuinely concerned, and realizing these people who only vaguely knew me as 'our friend's sister' cared more than she did pretty much killed all goodwill I had for her.

I kept hanging out with her for a while, but things faded pretty fast from that point on. She alienated a lot of people by being so thirsty she'd go along with awful behavior, and things died for good after she said some really homophobic stuff knowing I'd just talked to her a week ago about thinking I was a lesbian."

Tragically Taken Too Soon

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Tragically Taken Too Soon

"My ex best friend is an ex friend because of death.

When I met her, she was a boy. She came out to me as trans when we were in high school and I was the first one to use her preferred name and pronouns. She got on hormones and she (who, as a boy, was already very emotional) could not handle the hormones. She hung herself. It was a big shock to the system. She told me 2 weeks prior that she was happier than she had ever been and was so happy to finally be transitioning and her parents were going to help her legally change her name. But I could tell something was bugging her at the end. I had tried to be supportive without prying. Right before she died I asked her what was wrong and she told me she would tell me later. I understood because I didn't want to force her to tell me something she wasn't ready to talk about. Later never came. I still don't even know why she felt so low.

I was the only non-family member who was allowed to see her before they cremated her. They didn't have a viewing because she died at home so they had to autopsy her and that causes issues with appearances of the body. It's a really horrible thing to have to experience."

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"I Hope She Gets The Help She Needs"

"Back in the days of Myspace, a girl friended me because we both loved the same band.

And talking to her was cool, goofy stuff, imagining silly things about the band, talking about college. She had depression, I had anxiety, we would discuss that.

She actually came to visit me in New Jersey once. It was fun, going to the Poe House and the Franklin Institute, seeing our favorite band play.

Yeah, we were mainly online friends, and I had a life outside of that. Work, school, other friends, boyfriends. We didn't talk as much after that.

What really broke the camel's back was the Facebook and the Tumblr posts. Everything from her was sad. 'I hate my life,' 'I hate life,' 'What's the point of living?' 'I'm never gonna get out of this town.' Showing a blurry, bloody arm on Tumblr. But every time anyone, myself included, would comfort her, she'd get offended. If I was serious, silly, it didn't matter. It was definitely attention seeking. She was in her late 20's. And I stopped giving into that attention. I unfollowed her on Tumblr (which, I only really use for stupid memes) and Twitter. I unfriended her on Facebook. I know depression is awful. But to just make posts about it and do nothing, it's a bit like the boy who cried wolf.

I hope she gets the help she needs."

Who Needs Friends When You Have A Friend In Jesus?

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Who Needs Friends When You Have A Friend In Jesus?

"My friend came up to me at lunch one day and asked me if I knew so and so girl. I said no, and he said that he thought she was hot but had no classes with her, no friends in common, nothing to talk to her about but he found out that she goes to the church his mom goes to, so he asked if I wanted to go to church so he could get at her. Go to church to pick up girls? My 16-year-old mind thought that was genius. So Sunday rolled around, he picked me up and off we went.

He was a good-looking guy, athletic but socially awkward. I'm okay at best looking, pudgy, but pretty outgoing so pretty solid combo when it comes to spitting game; he brings them in and I keep them entertained. So we spotted her and joined the group and got to talking and making friends and it was actually cool, so we went back the next week and the week after that. All of a sudden, it had been six months and we were heavily invested in this church youth group. That girl turned out to have a boyfriend, but we liked all the other people anyway.

I'm an atheist, so I was just there to kick it with my boy and other people my age, but he got invested in the religion aspect. He decided he wanted to be a pastor and started cutting off all our friends except for me since they were in his mind the cause of sin in his life. He then would only ever talk to me about God and not our actual shared interests, so eventually, I told him I wasn't going to attend the youth group anymore. He got furious and cut me off too.

The friends that he all cut out and I got even closer after high school, and now he's in the navy."

The Gossip Train Stops Here

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The Gossip Train Stops Here

"I'm very private when it comes to my relationships. I went through a really bad breakup. My friend and I had been really good friends up until that point, but when I went through my breakup, she was the most supportive friend you can ever imagine. Slept over a lot so I wouldn't be alone, took me out so I wouldn't stay at home and sulk all day long, made sure I got to work and checked in on me throughout the whole day.

A couple of months after my breakup, I was working the night shift when a colleague of mine came over to me and said that she was so sorry about what my ex had done and that no one deserved to be treated like that. I asked her what she meant by that because I never told her or anyone else at my workplace a thing.

Apparently, she had gone to my friend, who's a hairdresser, to cut and dye her hair, and my friend had then gossiped about my breakup and 'recovery' to her. I would go on to find out that she entertained a lot of clients with the story of my tragic love life, in detail."

This Is Why You Don't Move In With Your

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This Is Why You Don't Move In With Your "Friends"

"I let him stay with me for a week while he was in between apartments. Three days in, he lost his headphones but didn't tell me, and two days later, he looked through my stuff and found my pair of headphones of the same brand, took them, and claimed they were his.

I asked for them back and he said I could borrow them. The next day he marched into my room at 1 am and yelled at me for 10 minutes about how I was a jerk for stealing his headphones and I was a terrible friend and an idiot.

He left for two hours and then came back like nothing happened. I gave him the headphones (they were only like $30, I just bought another and didn't care too much) and politely told him that our friendship meant more to me than headphones, so he could take them but could no longer stay with me due to his behavior, even though he only had a couple more days.

I haven't talked to him since, but several mutual friends are angry with me because he told everyone I stole his headphones, yelled at him, and then kicked him out for no reason."

Were They Really All That Good Of Friends To Begin With?

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Were They Really All That Good Of Friends To Begin With?

"My best friend of almost 20 years told my 13-year-old child that she would need plastic surgery, to diet, and an entire new wardrobe to fit in at her new school.

He also tried to convince me that I wasn't an addict. I had been clean for two months at the time and was fresh out of treatment. He offered me multiple substances on numerous occasions trying to get me to break. He agreed to let us move in to escape the unsafe home we were in, but he went maniacally insane. The last straw was him making some off the cuff remarks to me about 'not wanting to associate with anyone who didn't fit his image of celebrity.'

I wrote a Dear John note, packed my stuff, and took my kid while he was at work. I blocked him on every conceivable social media and haven't spoken to him since."

You Don't Outgrow Friendship

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You Don't Outgrow Friendship

"We met in high school and were pretty close friends. I went to community college, and she went to a very nice private school. She stopped talking to me when I started dating a guy I liked, and she refused to meet him. She stopped talking to me even though I tried several times to say hello, and I talked nicely with her parents and voiced that I was concerned because I knew she was busy but she never stated there was an issue between us.

I had to work a lot to make ends meet and she didn't. She emailed me months later to tell me she had 'outgrown me,' that we couldn't be friends anymore, and not to contact her.

It hurts all these years later, but I've been happily married to that guy I dated for seven years now."

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