Sometimes things can be going really well. The wedding is set and ready to go, the trip is planned and the car packed, the flight about to take off - When suddenly something goes horribly wrong. It starts off small and before you know it, sprinklers are going off and there's a fire in the corner. Some people are running for their lives, while others are rolling around tearing each other to pieces. The people in the following stories thought everything was going well too when suddenly something went wrong and before they knew it everything was in utter chaos.
Points have been edited for clarity.
"I got sucked into attending the wedding of the daughter of a woman I had met at a party. This woman and I had zero contact with each other except sleeping with each other one week beforehand, and a text message asking me to go to a wedding with her. Not a text mentioning it was her daughter's wedding. Just 'a wedding'. I didn't even know she had a kid. Never mind one old enough to get married.
So anyway, I arrive at the country club where they are having the ceremony. The woman I was meeting up with is in the lobby screaming and yelling at some guy, who I learned later was her ex. A huge fight goes on for about 10 minutes, and he storms out. She then turns to me and says, 'My daughter's dad left her without anyone to walk her down the aisle. You're doing it.'
I had no idea what was going on. So in the interest of getting smashed at the reception, I agreed.
Everything quiets down and I'm introduced to her daughter (and her daughter's kids). The music starts and out I go walking a complete stranger down the aisle. Pictures are being snapped and people are all wonder who I am.
It really was no biggie because this wasn't a fancy wedding by any means. It looked more like a weird family reunion than anything.
So the ceremony goes ahead, and everything seems to be okay. There's a bit of a break for the photographer to get pictures of the couple and their families. Again, I am told I am taking the place of the father and will be in the photos. So there are a few dozen pictures of me with this bride.
I should probably also mention she's wicked hot. Anyway, an hour goes by and I'm completely over this whole thing, but whatever, the bar is open. So I proceed to order numerous drinks to try and wash away the day's events. I do my best. I start to succeed. Until I hear, 'You stole my shoes!' Being yelled. I poke my head into the reception room to see the woman I was there with beating the ever-loving snot out of a bridesmaid. We are talking handfuls of hair and punching her repeatedly in the face. Me, being the father figure I was, pretended to try to break up the fight. But realistically, it was too hilarious.
Someone had the good sense to call the cops. Thankfully.
The cops show up and remove the bride's mother from the premises. This causes the bride to freak out and attack the same bridesmaid because obviously, it was her fault.
The cops break it up and the manager of the venue shuts the whole thing down. They then come to me about the damages. Because, well... I'm the dad apparently.
I didn't even get dinner.
After some explaining, everything gets sorted. The cops let mommy dearest out of the car, we jump a cab back to her place because crazy sometimes makes for a fun time. 2 hours later, the bride shows up with a swollen face and bloody mouth. Her new hubby beat her up. The cops are called again.
At this point, I'm wearing a borrowed housecoat because we were in the middle of 'something'. I'm also consoling hot newlywed daughter. The cops are dealing with the angry crazy half-naked mother. The husband gets arrested.
I still never got dinner.
I left shortly after that. Changed my phone number, and never tangoed with crazy again."
"My sister is a registered nurse and recently got pulled to a wedding where her boyfriend was friends with somebody. Anyway, standard wedding going on, maybe a little more partying early on than is usual, but pretty boring. She gets up from the table and tells her boyfriend that she is going to the bathroom and will be right back.
So she heads to the can and goes in and is punched in the face with odor. She finds a girl passed out in the toilet, who has not only puked everywhere but also messed herself. Keep in mind this is like, 8 pm. So my sister, being the consummate professional she is starts trying to help this girl.
She tries to get the door of the stall open but it is locked and they can't get this girl out. She's concerned about her choking so they tell someone to get the maintenance guy and also call 911. The maintenance arrives and he has no idea how to open the door. So my sister then tells him to go get a ladder and something long to flick the latch. He doesn't understand as he does not speak english, so they have to go out to the wedding and find someone who can translate. He comes back with a chair and a broom and opens the stall. The ambulance is not going to be coming anytime soon because it's a Saturday and passed out at a wedding is a low priority. So anyway they get the door open and they pull her out. She is covered in it all. So being a nurse, she is no stranger to poop and gets some gloves from the cleaning guy and just starts tidying her up. The way she told it went something like, 'I just wanted to pee but here I am touching a stranger's hoo-ha.'
So she gets tidied up and the girl kind of comes around. She says the ambulance will come and take care of her. She doesn't want the ambulance, but too bad, it's coming. She can refuse treatment when it arrives, but it's coming. At this point, the girl just starts projectile vomiting and pooping an unholy fire hydrant of liquids all over the bathroom floor. My sister jumps out of the way and hops up on the counter while she redecorates the room with diarrhea. On its own, this is pretty messed up, but not the worst thing ever. Enter her sister.
So the girl on the floor turning inside out is not alone. Her nearly equally wasted sister shows up to the bathroom and sees the vile, soaked floor with her sister in the middle of it. Instead of doing the rational, even inebriated person thing, you know, showing some concern, she instead begins to verbally berate her passed out poop fountain of a sister. Who is, by the way, still streaming. She is calling her names and telling her how dare she drink so much she poops her pants. She then goes to kick her sister, slips, falls, hits her head on the bathroom counter and knocks herself out. There are now two members of the same family lying in the puke/poop puddle on the floor. She now has to call 911 again because of the head injury and change the urgency of the call, because they're still not there.
So at this point pooper starts coming around, having finally emptied herself of everything, and she wants to just go home. She is completely unaware of her physical appearance and there is no way she's going to be able to go out because she is completely naked and covered in poo. Someone is going to say something. At this time, the bride's mother then comes into the bathroom and freaks out at the scene. She has a panic attack but is able to comport herself long enough to not fall in poop. My sister is managing 3 medical cases in a bathroom full of poop when the ambulance arrives.
The paramedics come in and do their boring paramedic thing. Poop girl is now aware of herself and refuses treatment. Paramedics say okay and begin to leave. My sister then yells at poop girl that she is going to get on the stretcher and go to the hospital. This convinces her and she agrees to go. Before they leave she asks what hospital they are going to and the poop girl asks her to call her mom. So my sister then called the mother of two complete strangers and explained this whole situation and that she needed to meet them at the hospital and bring a change of clothes for both girls.
Finally able to kind of take a breather, my sister is about to leave the scene of the crime and tell her boyfriend they are leaving when a half-inebriated lawyer enters and threatens to sue her for mishandling the situation. After helping two strangers covered in their own fecal matter, she is now being threatened with a lawsuit. Meanwhile, her boyfriend is still unaware.
She goes back to the table and tells him they are leaving, having never been able to pee herself."
"We had a neighbor and everything he did turned into a circus. Let me give you a prime example. He hires a guy to cut down a massive tree in his yard. It's a large yard and even though the tree is about 100 feet tall they've got plenty of space to drop it, I guess around 270 degrees out of 360. My dad saw them walking down the yard with the chainsaw and called me over to watch. Judging by the neighbor's previous attempts at various things we knew it was going to be good.
So they stand there looking at the tree. Talking. Gesticulating. Then the neighbor's friend starts up the chainsaw and begins cutting. I was a kid so I didn't know much about it but my dad says, 'Idiot. He's cutting too far around. I better go give them a hand.'
No sooner has he stood up than we see the neighbor's friend literally throw his chainsaw away and start pushing against this tree trunk, which has started to move ever so slightly in the wrong direction. Idiot neighbor joins him and together they attempt to push against what is easily over a ton of tree that has begun to fall.
My Dad is shouting, 'Get the heck out of the way!' Which, thankfully, they do. The tree falls in exactly the worst possible place, all along the wooden fence with an adjoining property, smashing it to splinters. It also takes out a tree in their yard and only just missed their house.
Another time idiot neighbor does not like leaves in his yard for some reason, he has a real thing about it (probably why he got rid of the tree mentioned earlier). Right in the corner of the left side of the neighbor's yard (and growing over where all three yards join) is a massive avocado tree.
So, I see our idiot neighbor picking up avocado leaves and fling them over into our other neighbor's property. He's cursing. As he picks up more he gets angrier and angrier, flinging them back over the fence. By this time I've stopped raking and am just watching the show.
He gets so angry he jumps over the fence to where the avocado tree is and starts climbing it. He climbs up and starts trying to tear off smaller branches that are overhanging his yard. Suddenly he lets out a shout of pain and surprise. We found out later a massive huntsman spider had bitten him (I didn't even know those things could bite people, but they aren't venomous). I see him windmill his arms wildly and then almost in graceful slow-motion fall out of the tree - straight down into his own yard smashing into the roof of his dog's kennel. Thankfully it is a) flat, b) poorly constructed and c) large enough so he can not hit the sides, so he falls straight through onto his dog's bedding. He was lucky and probably saved himself some serious injury."
"I was at Walmart once. My girlfriend and I are buying stuff for our new apartment and there are these kids in the sports aisle across that little aisle-highway playing with a football. Kids being kids. One was 13ish. The other was younger, maybe 8 or 9.
Well, the littler of the idiots toss the football a little too high to his older brother, and it knocks over some boxes on the top shelf of the aisle behind them. Immediately, a large man screams bloody murder from that aisle. The two kids freeze and look at each other for some sort of direction as to what to do. They decide to see what happened. I walk over there too, telling my girlfriend that I'm looking for something in the next aisle. This is where it gets good.
Well, the box that fell was in the fishing and hunting aisle, and it fell right through the display case where all the knives are, shattering the glass and lodging some shards in this poor old man's hands. He is FURIOUS. The kids are too late to run. As soon as they round the corner with their guilty looking faces, he knew. Oh, he knew. So he chased them. Slowly. He's an old man, he can't run very fast.
The kids start to run, right as the boys' mom comes over to check on her brats, who run right by her. 'Old Man Shardy-Hands', shards still in his hands, tries to stop short, but couldn't, so he put his hands up to brace himself, slicing open the mom. She had cuts on her hands, face, shoulders, and even got some shards in herself too! Well, she fell over, and the kids were gone, and the old man is confused, and security comes to fix the situation. I'm reeling.
Long story short, it took 3 security guards to get a hold of 'Old Man Shardy Hands', because he insisted he doesn't need help, swatting his shards at the guards when they tried to get close. EMTs came shortly after, and told us, bystanders, to get out. Never change, Walmart."
"I went camping with a bunch of friends in college. There were at least 15 of us. It was fourth of July weekend and we all went tubing down a long river with multiple coolers strapped to the sturdiest of our floaty devices.
Fast forward to a few hours later. We've all been hammered in the sun for hours. We reach the end of our trip and have to get out of the water. Cops are present at this pickup point to keep idiots from getting into vehicles they'd parked beforehand. Two of the folks in our group were unaware of the police presence, and they proceeded to crack fresh bottles as they were getting out of their tubes. They got open intoxication tickets among some other things. They were both teachers, so they were freaking out. We had a sober ride lined up, it was just unfortunate that these decent people got themselves in a significant amount of legal trouble. Despite all this, we ended up having a great time that night.
Jump to the evening at camp. It's a public site, lots of strangers around. My brother and I were sharing a tent. I accidentally stepped on and crushed his junk trying to get back into my sleeping bag after going to the washroom in the woods. He had been sleeping at the time but awoke instantly to what he interpreted as an intentional assault on him. A loud violent sibling fight ensued, he began thoroughly kicking my butt. The savage melee destroyed the tent. Support stakes were ripped from the ground as our sleeping quarters became a mobile battle arena, a fabric combat sphere wrapped in darkness. As my brother and I beat the ever loving snot out of one another our tent was nearing the edge of the lake. A solid tackle by my opponent sent the entire mess toppling into the abyss. We forgot about killing each other long enough to remember how to swim and escaped to dry land.
An unknown woman immediately ran up to us with 911 dialed on her cell phone and threatened to 'freaking hit send!' She had heard the entire fight. My brother and I walked away seeking shelter in opposite directions after promising to avoid, 'Waking up her children because they're trying to SLEEEEP!'
As I walked soaking wet back to camp I became aware of another commotion. Apparently one of the couples that were camping with us were having issues inside their tent. They were acquaintances at best and none of us knew them well. To put it bluntly, the jerk was literally 'taking' his girlfriend against her will. My friends had heard the entire exchange and decided to intervene. Instead of struggling to get the tent flap unzipped they used a pocket knife to gain entrance, dragged the disgusting parasite out, and beat the absolute life out of the guy. The cops were called, the dirtbag's girlfriend didn't want to press charges and they left together. Somehow my friends avoided trouble for beating up the scumbag, the police said they had done the right thing.
The folks in our group that weekend were good people. Never had issues like this before, but the combination of my brother and I swimming in a tent and having to beat down a random jerk really killed the entire trip. My brother apologized and we laughed about our fight."
"I was at a party once on an island with a group of friends, when another group of guys showed up. They where all bigger, older and inebriated before they got there. They kept disrespecting us and the owner's house. We ended up getting into a brawl with them in the driveway. Even though they were all bigger they used rocks and bottles. My friend got a croquet mallet and hit a dude full force in the forehead. I will never forget the sound it made. Everyone just stopped fighting. One of the girls started screaming, 'Oh my God he's dead! He's dead!' The rest of them started to cry and ran into the house. The cops and EMS came. The cops arrested my friend for attempted murder and the EMS took the downed guy to a helicopter pad to get immediate attention from the hospital. Turns out the guy had a fractured skull and bleeding from the brain. The only reason he wasn't a veggie was because of the helicopter. The district attorney dropped charges against my friend, citing self-defense."
"I was at LAX on November 22nd when a car crash near my terminal was mistaken for shots fired, prompting a mass panic and evacuation of the entire airport.
At the time I was sitting at my gate waiting for boarding. I saw a uniformed woman run by. She looked like she worked somewhere at one of the stores. She was being chased by someone else in the same uniform. I thought to myself, 'That's cute two airport employees playing tag in the airport for whatever reason.'
3 seconds later I hear yelling and about a million people ran behind them and it made sense. I picked up my bags and began walking to the nearest exit trying to keep my head. There was TONS of screaming and a lot of people deering in the headlights. I must have passed about 50 people just lying in piles on the floor with their luggage... hiding? I'm not really sure what their plan was, as we were about 20 yards from a very clearly marked exit. After pointing it out to as many of them as I could, I exited and we waited a bit before they let us back into the same terminal.
Still, no one knew what had happened and moments after being let back in a squad of armored officers with weapons ran through screaming for everyone to get on the floor. After another hour or so we were all evacuated back to security screening, probably because they let thousands of people back into the terminal after the original panic without rescreening. Going through the security check again took like 4 hours, with crowds of people as far as I could see in every direction.
LAX was a layover too for me. My delayed flight still took off without me and I had to sleep on the floor of LAX terminal 4 until the next flight out in the morning. It was quite an experience. Seeing so many people freak out during the panic was a real eye-opener. To be fair I believe this was a couple of weeks after the TSA shooting there."
"The first wedding I ever went to was just a raging disaster. I didn't even know the couple, the groom was a friend of the guy I was dating so I got dragged along as the plus one. The wedding was out on a golf course in summer so it was hotter than Hades out there. We wait... and we wait. Then we wait some more and I start thinking maybe the bride ran off. Then this white limo comes flying up the drive and literally screeches to a halt burning off some tire. Turns out the limo company forgot to pick up the bride.
It's two hours later than it should've been at this point when we finally get started, so the sun's going down. Naturally, people do what they do and start taking pictures. That's when the maid of honor hits the floor and has a grand mal seizure because the flashes set her off. So they call an ambulance and carry on with the ceremony which was really awkward because the paramedics are there with this poor girl and the bride is saying her 'I do's' and keeps looking over and shouting, 'Tracy I love you I hope you're okay!'
I gave up and went home after the ceremony because it was late and I had stuff to do. The guy I was dating stayed for the reception though. According to him the bride's mother got completely plastered and started screaming that her daughter's wedding had been ruined, so she turned over the table with all the gifts on it and stomped on as many of them as she could."
"One of my brother's had the craziest wedding in which they announced they were pregnant right before the ceremony (stealing their own thunder).
They had it outdoors at this strange country club place. I don't know how to describe what it was, but they did not seem to understand how to do a wedding. It was windy, they had the ceremony outside, chairs and other things blew away. They invited around 100 people, they had around half the people not bother to show up after RSVPing.
The desserts (besides the wedding cake) never showed up (which worked out I guess with the number of people who were missing).
My brother asked me to give a speech (like just called me up to say a few words without any warning), after telling me my daughter wasn't allowed at the wedding because it was 'no children' which I might have understood had they not allowed the maid of honor and the brides sister to each bring their children as exceptions (one a newborn, one a few months older than my daughter).
It turned out I wasn't the only one asked to give a speech without being warned. My other brother gave an epic speech he just said, 'I'm a cop, and if your relationship was a car on the highway, I'd give you a speeding ticket and say slow down cause you're going too fast,' and then he sat back down.
They were divorced before they made it to 1 year."
"My senior year of high school, I played the Beast/Prince in Disney's Beauty and the Beast. Being April in Northern California, it was considerably hot.
Additionally, the mask I had was a teddy bear hood complete with a pound of stage makeup. To keep from sweating off the makeup, the crew had rigged a semi-circle of box fans backstage to keep me cool when I wasn't on.
We get to the transformation in the final scene and an electrical fire starts backstage. This triggers the fire alarm and on-stage sprinklers, soaking the orchestra. Because we were poor, we just used a fog screen to hide crew removing my makeup and mask.
When the alarm went off, the fog guy dropped the fog machine and ran leaving it pointing right at my 'south pole'. I happened to scream 'My junk!' just as the orchestra stopped playing.
Also, I had to stumble downstage with half of my makeup off and awkwardly ad lib with the other soaked actors for about 5 minutes while the director and staff silently tried to decide if they should move forward with the show.
Needless to say, the orchestra picked up and the fire department showed up a few minutes later and ever since nothing on stage or screen has intimidated me."