"I got a new job and after a few weeks spent getting comfortable, I started putting my food in the shared refrigerator. We all know where this is going. Well, after having my ranch dressing broken into three times, I decided to do something. Mind you, I had my name written on it, the second time I had tape around the lid, and the third time, I taped the lid again and drew lines on the seal to prove it was opened a third time.
After much thought, as I didn't want to get anyone truly sick by using human bits or fluids, I decided to spike it. Half the ranch was left, so I filled it back up to full with half a can of salt, 5 tablespoons of ground cayenne pepper, and mayonnaise. The salt did not fully dissolve, there was so much. Before sealing it, I decided to taste my own medicine. I had to know how bad it was. It was like instantly gagging from the salt, followed by a nasty mayonnaise tangy taste and then the burn from the cayenne...perfect! I set the trap the next day, with only a tiny piece of tape over the seal so I could tell when someone opened it. I only wish I could have been there to see their face when they tasted it, and then the anger after they realized they dumped it all over their salad."
"I used to sell cars. One Saturday, a very busy Saturday where people were buying left and right, I had just finished up with one customer and was looking for the next one. One of my co-workers walked up to me with an older couple and said he had an appointment who just showed up, so could I help his customers? They're looking at whatever. Sure, I can help.
Well, I get to talking with these folks and they're not buyers. They're not even close. They were just there to waste time. A few minutes later, I see my co-worker pointing and laughing with a couple managers at how he had just pawned off some tire kickers on me. So I politely got the lookers to leave and started plotting.
I knew it was supposed to rain later that week and I knew there was a truck on the very far end of the lot with a dead battery. The lot was very long and thin, about 100 yards deep and 400 yards wide. The showroom was not quite in the middle, it was about 300 yards from there to the far end of the lot where the truck was located. This truck was a honeypot. It was a heavy-duty truck that was just completely loaded. Huge markup.
I have a friend who used to be in the auto industry. She had worked in sales and finance for 20 years. She knows her stuff. More importantly, she knows all the sweet nothings to say to a salesman to get his juices flowing. I got her to call him and start talking about how she needs a high dollar truck for her business because she needs a tax write off. Something like a truck she saw on our website and then gave the stock number. Cash in hand, ready to buy. Then she asked for an appointment on that rainy Wednesday, which also happened to be his day off.
Wednesday comes around and it's disgusting. It's just pouring. The dealership had a covered golf cart for driving around the lot with customers in the rain, but its batteries had died a few weeks prior. My coworker showed up on his day off, all excited for this big fish sale. The deal my friend had discussed with him was just too good to be true, so he was ecstatic to be there. This was the kind of deal that would make his month and then some.
He went and got the key, trudged through the rain, all the way to the far end of the overflow lot, and tried to start the truck to pull it around. Nope, the battery was flat. So he had to walk all the way back to the showroom in the pouring rain, get a jump box, and walk back out to the truck and jump start it. At this point, he's soaked. His pants are all wet from waking back and forth in puddles. He had gotten all wet while he was trying to jump-start the truck because it's impossible to jump-start a huge truck while holding an umbrella. Finally, he pulled the truck up front.
The appointment was set for 1 pm. That time came and went, so he called my friend at about 1:30. My friend says sorry, I'm running late, I'll be there about 3 or so. 3 o'clock comes and goes, and no buyer has shown up. He calls her again and...nothing. She completely ghosted him. So he had to take the truck back to its spot, with rain still coming down. He was so mad, yet he never knew it was me the whole time. Still has no idea to this day."
"I once started a tech company and developed a very marketable product. I was a techie who couldn't sell his way out of a paper bag so, after about four years, I found a couple of partners to work with to help market and promote a business based on my tech and take things to the next level. They didn't buy their way in and our contract wasn't written with adequate protection for me. Since we were all 'friends,' I never thought anything bad would happen.
Things were progressing nicely toward building a business while we each still had day jobs. We were starting to be successful and edging towards the ability to make quit-your-job kind of money. After a while, my partners started acting strangely and started floating the great idea to form a new business, form a new LLC and roll our existing successful business into it as 'one of the offerings' which we would all make zillions from. They talked it up for weeks and eventually sent me a lengthy and confusing contract to sign. I knew right away the ideas for the other offerings for the new business were losers. I got the suspicion that the only reason they wanted to do this was so they could exploit the revenue from the existing emerging business and do away with me in the partnership. I smelled a rat and my spidey senses were tingling.
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